Yes, I Read the Papers (the free ones anyway...)

On the train into work this morning I had time to grab a copy of the Metro, the free commuter newspaper. After skimming through the pretty drab pages a wee article caught my eye and my immediate thought was "Ooooh I could post this on my blog tonight!" And post it I did lol.

The article was entitled "The jargon we should all sunset" and basically it was all about new indecipherable management speak likely to be hot in offices around the country in 2007. Currently used expressions like "thinking outside the box" and "park that thought" are likely to have passed their sell-by-date but here are some buzzwords you can come to expect this year...

• Getting down with the kids meaning a manager trying to interact with junior staff.
• Open up your kimono meaning putting your cards on the table.
• Let's raise the anchor and let this one drift meaning to forget about a bad idea.
• A thought grenade is the result of a productive thought shower, it is an explosively good idea.
• Let's sunset that is what happens to bad ideas - they never surface again.
• Workers will never again attend meetings... information touchpoints will be on the agenda instead.
• Little 'r' me is the new request for a private answer to an e-mail.

So there ya go. I'm not totally convinced these little gems will appear in my office any time soon! I do like a couple of them (let's sunset that and information touchpoints) but seriously, open up your kimono lol. And how patronising would it be to get down with the kids?!?!

Anyway, while I'm on the subject of newspaper articles, I was reading a pretty funny one in the Scotsman online today about the warped view of the foreign tourist to Scotland. Click here for the full article. Basically it was saying that although tourists to Scotland in 2006 may have displayed excellent taste in their choice of destination, they really could and should have researched a little more. Here are some of the stupid questions put to VisitScotland (the tourist board) last year...

• Clearly confusing Loch Ness with Sea World in Orlando... "What time of night does the Loch Ness Monster surface and who feeds it?" Answer - Nessie is pretty much a mythical creature who tends not to leap through hoops!
• Not realising that an island in Scotland was the same as an island anywhere else in the world raised the question of "Which bus do I get from the Orkney Islands to the Shetland Islands?"
• Because Scotland's two major cities often get confused *sarcastic roll of the eyes* the question of "Is Edinburgh in Glasgow?" was raised. Just while I'm on this, I'll clarify that Scotland is, in fact, not in London!!
• "What time does the midnight train leave?" There are no words!
• The small island of Iona was pointed to on a map while one tourist asked "How do I get to one zero NA?" *Sigh*

Oh I could go on and on and on and on and on... but I won't! Lol. Ok just a little (Az this is really for your benefit 'cos I know you deal with these eejits everyday lol. A couple of other really bizarre questions were "Can you tell me where the mountain is in Scotland?" and "Are there any curves in the roads here, or are they all straight?"

I know we all have our moments and hey, I even have ditsy and dense moments lol, but come on people! Would the same people ask which subway line runs between New York City and Seattle? Or where the ruin is in Rome? Or if Canada is in America?

Actually... I think they would.....